by Shelley Bennett
Scattered among the “First Day of School” posts are the “College Drop Off” posts. Both are written by proud parents sharing their kids’ educational journeys, but the tone differs a little.
While they are similarly hopeful, positive, and encouraging, you can often hear the conflicting emotions behind the words written by the college student’s parent.
A little wavery, maybe tearful, and the very definition of bittersweet.
This past weekend, my husband Leo and I were in those shoes as we dropped of our youngest child Sofia at Linfield University in McMinnville, OR.
We went through the motions of setting up her dorm room, shopping a little more, adding to her décor, then shopping again. We were all smiling and cheery but there was something insincere about it.
That night we sat down for dinner at an amazing Mediterranean restaurant called Cyprus. As we looked over the menu, a man and his young daughter sat down beside us.
It reminded me of a time when our family was in Disneyland. Sofia was about 4 and the boys were 8 and 6. After our afternoon rest time, Sofia decided she was done with Disneyland. She had waited in line twice to see the princesses and that was about all she cared about.
Her older brothers were not done. They had rides to go on! Snacks to eat! Fireworks to watch! So, after a quick parent conference, Leo decided to take Sof to Downtown Disney and I took the boys to the park.
A few hours later, we met up at Wetzel’s Pretzels where Sofia was soaking up being the center of her dad’s attention. She had this look on her face that I recognized right away: she had successfully wrapped her dad around her little finger.
I saw a similar relationship between the father and daughter sitting next to us. She wanted French fries and lemonade to start, followed by the shrimp dish. And that’s what she got.
We ate our dinner, discussed the day, and planned the next. As we finished up, Leo nodded at the neighboring table and said, ”That reminds me of when Sof and I…” and I finished his sentence with “were at Wetzel’s Pretzels in Downtown Disney?”
As our eyes met, the tears welled up and started to spill over.
They say Time is a thief and I have to agree. It felt like one minute you’re watching your four-year old daughter boss her dad around in Disneyland and the next she’s telling him where to put the refrigerator in her dorm room. What happened to all those moments and memories in between?
As Leo and I sniffed and wiped the tears away, Sofia said, “Now the waitress thinks you just told me you are getting divorced.” She’s always been like that, quick to add a sarcastic comment to lighten a serious situation. We laughed and paid our check.
There were more tears (and laughter) the next morning when we said good-bye and left to go home. In my heart, I know that Sofia will be ok. She’s found her place and now she’ll find her people. The question is, will I be ok?
And yes, I will be too. It will just take some time to get used to a quiet house, having our daily conversations over Snap and not in person, and impatiently waiting for her next visit.
My heart goes out to all the parents out there going through the same thing. The Class of 2024 is spreading their wings and flying all over and we are so fortunate to have a front row seat.
Remember when news was ‘newsy’? When you read about weddings, family events and engagement announcements in the newspaper? If you have something that might be newsworthy, please submit it to [email protected] and I’ll do my best to include it here in “The Good Stuff.”
